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Anxiety is a mental health issue. It can stem from a variety of things: mind chemistry, life events, PTSD, etc.
Anxiety is silent. Most of us with it are good at hiding it…for the most part. Our friends don’t really understand it. Some “get it” sort of, if they suffer from depression or other mental issue.
What Does It Feel Like?
The best way to describe it is to give examples and then say imagine what you would experience emotionally if any of these were to happen to you.
- First day of work.
- First day of school.
- The plane you are on just dropped 2000 feet in the air with no warning.
- You were just handed a pink slip.
There are a lot of emotions attached to those events, and one of them is probably anxiety.
Your heart pounds. You feel paralyzed. Your mind starts to race. Your chest might hurt or tighten. Your stomach might go into knots. Your lungs may tighten and send you into a coughing fit. Symptoms are different for everyone. I do know that exhaustion hits after the anxiety dissipates.
I told one friend that it is like being confronted with a bear, turning and running for your life, and trying to recover from that flight (run).
Many years ago, I went to dinner with a friend who suffers from it. She could barely eat because she was so anxiety ridden. She was aloof, pale, and like a blank wall.
Now I understand it, and she and I talk a lot to help each other out. We have other common ground, but the anxiety is one we each understand. We can listen; give ideas; show support.
Who Does it Affect?
Anxiety doesn’t hit everyone. For those it does hit, it comes at different times of life and under varying circumstances. It appears it can also be genetic. When it first hit, I was around cousins who saw what I was going through. They told me they had been experiencing it since childhood. Normally I wouldn’t be thankful they understood, because no one with anxiety would wish it on anyone else. However, I was grateful they could give me tips and moral support.
What Are the Different Types?
There are also different types. These are just a few.
- Generalized Anxiety Disorder – GAD (basically anxious about anything)
- Agoraphobia (anxiety/fear of being out in the open)
- Social anxiety (anxiety/fear of anything involving people – especially lots of people and crowds).
Is There Help?
There are all sorts of ways the medical field tries to help you control the anxiety; therapy; drugs; nutrition. Sometimes those work and sometimes they do not work.
Therapy only takes you so far and gives you coping skills. The drugs can work (if they find the right concoction), but they can also wreak havoc on your body (high cholesterol, weight gain, memory loss). After I went off the drugs I lost about 20 pounds but also came to realize I do not remember much about events during the years I was on the medications. I consider those years lost and now rely on my husband to fill in the details.
How Does it Affect Relationships?
For those in a relationship, anxiety can take a toll on the other person. They work at being strong for you and showing support. They see what the person with anxiety experiences and they feel helpless.
They can get worn out and frustrated.
What we should do is ensure the one we love has time away from us, and we have to make sure we watch our dependency on their strength. On bad days (high anxiety) that is difficult. However, on days when we can manage, we must make sure to do it on our own. And, we must make sure they know we appreciate everything they do and make sure they know we love them!
Thankfully, I had a wonderful therapist that helped me recognize when I was being dependent. She helped me learn coping skills. So, when my husband asks if a certain action from him would help, I can identify if it is an enabling action or something that will help in a healthy way.
There are definitely good days and bad days.
How Do I (Personally) Combat It?
Anxiety doesn’t have to drive my life. Some days it does; other days I move forward and push through.
On bad days I tend to put on music that will lift my spirits. I especially love songs from Plumb, MercyMe, Josh Wilson, and an early-career Carrie Underwood.
Plumb suffers from anxiety and talked about it in an interview posted on New Release Tuesday:
The song was inspired initially about an emotional ordeal I had in high school. I was taken back to a place where I struggled with anxiety, and I still have that struggle. In high school, it manifested itself through panic attacks. They were terribly painful stomach cramps that were embarrassing and debilitating, and I would find myself hiding in the restroom quoting Isaiah 41:10 over and over to myself.
Her song, Need You Now, on her album Need You Now shares her struggles with anxiety.
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MercyMe’s song, Greater, lifts my spirits by reminding me of 1 John 4:4:
You, dear children, are from God and have overcome them, because the one who is in you is greater than the one who is in the world.
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Josh Wilson’s song, Pushing Back the Dark, on his album Carry Me hits home because anxiety is darkness, and I have to remember to keep moving forward and not let the dark overcome me. He even speaks about his own battle with anxiety on his website, Josh Wilson Music.
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Lastly is Carrie Underwood’s, Jesus Take the Wheel. It reminds me that I need to let God drive my life not anxiety. I know I must hand over all my anxieties to Him and let Him take control.
Be anxious for nothing, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God. And the peace of God, which surpasses all comprehension, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus. ~ Philippians 4:6-7
Learning to turn it all over to God takes daily practice, faith, and prayer. Some days are definitely better than others.
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These days the focus is on one thing; the motto I have with my close friend: God’s Got This. And He does!
